


How He Feels

by oneindigorose



Category: Glee
Genre: Angst, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-25
Updated: 2014-06-25
Packaged: 2018-02-06 05:55:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1846915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oneindigorose/pseuds/oneindigorose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So maybe sleeping with Quinn wasn't the best idea. Puck just really wants Finn to forgive him but Finn seems to want nothing to do with him.</p><p>“Puck, I know that you want to talk to Finn, but, I just don’t think now is a good time, with Regionals coming up and all. We need Finn on his A-game and I don’t think a confrontation from you will help." Puck feels like he might throw up. He was banned from seeing his best friend, banned from Glee, and banned from football. His life was crumbling around him and his supports were collapsing at his feet. He leaves without protest.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How He Feels

**Author's Note:**

> The story starts with Finn punching Puck because he found out about Quinn being pregnant with Puck's baby. After that scene, the story sort of derails from the Glee plotline and some events are modified and/or left out to take the story where it needs to go.

As large fists pummeled his face, the real idiocy of his actions struck him full-force. Cheater, liar, jerk. In all honesty, Noah Puckerman had never, ever, cared about whom he was, actually, he took pride in it. But now that his best friend was so crushed, so unbelievably betrayed, he wished he could take it all back. Finn’s cry of why shredded his ego and pride in one slice, one night, caused him to lose everything. His face is numb.  
……………………..  
When Puck feels Finn being dragged off of him he realized that the assault had only lasted seconds, though it felt like years. Once more Finn asked, “Why?” And oh how Puck wished to tell him, to hold him and confess his feelings again and again. I was drunk, and I was thinking about you the whole time. I think I love you. Instead, they fight, he yells, Finn yells, and Quinn cries. Finn then storms out. As he looks back once, he meets Puck with a hateful glare. His heart breaks.  
…………………….  
Later that day, Finn slams Puck’s locker shut, crushing his hand in the process. Puck just cries out and says, “I’m sorry.” And for the first time in his entire life, he means it. Finn just storms off, leaving Puck to walk to the nurse’s office alone, she tells him to lay off football for a week. It’s not that he wasn’t mad about missing football, but it was a time where he got to see Finn. The nurse’s office is trashed when he stalks out.  
……………………  
Mr. Schue pulls him aside before Glee Club starts a few days later. “Puck, I know that you want to talk to Finn, but, I just don’t think now is a good time, with Regionals coming up and all. We need Finn on his A-game and I don’t think a confrontation from you will help. I’ve already talked to Ms. Pillsbury and she has decided to allow you to assist her during Glee.” Puck feels like he might throw up. He was banned from seeing his best friend, banned from Glee, and banned from football. His life was crumbling around him and his supports were collapsing at his feet. He leaves without protest.  
……………………  
After sitting in Ms. Pillsbury’s office for a week during Glee, she approaches him. “Noah, I think it’s time that we had a talk. You can’t go on like this. You’re miserable and it is affecting your grades tremendously.” Puck glances at her before walking out of the room. He goes to Finn’s house and waits for him to get home. Confrontations are a lot less intimidating on TV.  
…………………..  
“What do you want?” Finn seethes when he sees Puck on the front porch of his house. “Look man, I’m sorry, it’s just- I just- This just-” He trails off, not sure how to explain what he wanted to say. In the end, Finn punches him a couple more times, this time he just takes it. He can tell that Finn is starting to get over his anger because he helps Puck up and into his house to clean up before going home. When Finn begins to walk away Puck mutters, “I think I’m sorta in love with you.” Finn just turns to face him and calmly says, “Get out.” And he does.   
…………………  
The football team has never played worse, with their best players in a fight and everyone else taking Finn’s side on the matter. Early on Monday, Puck hears Finn telling Rachel about him confessing his feelings on Friday. Rachel obviously lets it slip to some others because he gets locked in the supply closet an hour later. He pounded on the door for a while but nobody hears him. Puck could hear the bell releasing the students to lunch and lets out a final yell. Hours later, school is released for the day and he’s still trapped in the closet. Coach Tanaka slips past to grab his keys and lock up, but he doesn’t hear Puck’s hoarse calls for help. Whoever locked him in must not have heard about Puck’s issues with confinement in small places. He hates life.  
……………….  
The next morning, after the first few periods, someone begins approaching the closet, Puck doesn’t even notice, considering he’s having another panic attack, this one worse than any he’s ever witnessed. Finn opens the door to retrieve the ball pump so he can inflate the new arrival of footballs, when puck literally falls out onto him. Luckily, Finn is a big guy and can hold Puck’s weight, because, Puck’s legs seem to be failing him at the moment. His breathing is rapid and his eyes are big and wild. “Hey, calm down man, you’re out of there now.” Finn tries to comfort, being a nice guy who happens to know about Puck’s claustrophobia. He doesn’t calm down.  
……………..  
Puck wakes up in his bedroom; Finn is sitting in his desk chair, hovering over the bedside. Puck groans and Finn sighs with relief and passes Puck a bottle of water. “How long were you in there? The nurse said to take you home and keep you hydrated and that you would be fine. Why didn’t anyone come sooner? Who would do this to you?” Finn gushes, beginning to pace.   
“Not sure who locked me up but I was in there for about a day. I’m starving; all I’ve eaten is some trail mix that I found on a shelf.” Puck says, getting out of bed and going downstairs to eat something. Finn follows on his tail, still raging about how everyone is deaf and lazy if they didn’t save him. All in all, Puck is flattered, Finn hasn’t really showed him this much concern since they were in elementary. He grins manically.  
…………………  
He recovers fine. Well, in the sense of, not dead, fine. His heart hurts. Finn still ignores him most of the time and his feelings just grow. After a few weeks, Finn approaches him in the halls. “Do you still have feelings for me?” He asks quietly. Puck is taken aback but still nods. “Then I think I know what to do. Maybe you just think you want me, so if we, you know, do it, then we’ll be back to normal.” Puck agrees, because maybe Finn is right… He can’t bring himself to doubt.  
…………………  
On Friday, when Finn is home alone and his mom won’t be back until Sunday, he calls Puck. And poor Puck can’t resist, no matter how much he wants to. So at 8:30 pm, Puck and Finn are sitting on the couch with beers in their hands, not speaking. Puck stands and claps awkwardly, “So, let’s do it. I guess.” Finn agrees and takes Puck upstairs.  
They don’t kiss. Finn thinks it’s too romantic. They just strip and stand there quietly. “ So I guess since I’m a virgin, and I don’t even want to think about getting something put in me like that, and since you’re the one with feelings in the first place, you get to bottom.” Finn says and gives Puck a look. “Fine.” Puck mutters and Finn takes that as his consent because then he says, “Hands and knees. Eye contact is too awkward.” Puck does it. He always will for Finn.  
……………….  
Turns out, neither boy knows what they are doing so when Fin just puts on a condom and a bit of lube and pushes in, Puck cries out. “Oh god, that hurts.” He wails and can’t hold back tears because it hurts. Finn just groans and mutters something similar to so tight. He begins to move and Puck nearly sobs. ‘Stop, please, let me adjust or something. God, it hurts.”   
After a few minutes it begins to feel better and Puck tells Finn that he can move. Finn slowly pulls out and pushes in, moaning loudly. Puck doesn’t feel as much pain anymore, and at some point Finn began to make him see stars when hit a certain part. He began to make tiny noises that were embarrassing to say the least. When Finn’s hips shudder and stop moving altogether, Puck expects to be jerked off or something. Finn just pulls out and says, “I think you need to leave.” He feels empty. And this time, when he gets home, he cries.  
……………….  
They lose Regionals. Quinn gives birth to Beth. Ms. Corcoran adopts her. Puck and Finn don’t speak. Their friendship is in shambles. Puck wanders the halls, lost. Glee is done for. He kind of wants to die. When he opens his locker in between classes he finds a note.   
Meet me at my place in 10.  
-Finn  
He wants to cry. The last time he was there, Finn broke him, and he never quite found all of the pieces. But at the same time, he could never say no to Finn.   
……………..  
When he arrives at Finn’s house he tentatively knocks on the door. Finn opens it and lets him come in. “Puck, we’re broken. I want to fix this so bad but I don’t know how! More importantly, I want to fix you. I can practically feel your pain every time I’m near you!” Finn says when Puck asks why he’s been invited.  
“The problem is, Finn, you know why I’m broken! You broke me! And now all you want is to fix me up! Well, too bad, I think I’m really too screwed up to fix now.” Puck says, beginning to leave.  
“Wait!” Finn calls to him, pulling him back. “Let me try something.” He says, putting his hands on either side of Puck’s face and leaning in. “Okay” Puck whispers before Finn is kissing him. It’s slow and easy and everything Puck has ever wanted.   
………………  
They end up shirtless in Finn’s bed. Finn strokes Puck’s arms and lightly trails his fingertips across his friend’s toned chest, raising goose bumps in his wake. “I think I kind of love you too. It’s just been so hard with Quinn and Rachel and all of everything else. I forgot to really stop and think about being with you instead of avoiding you.” Finn says, kissing Puck’s neck.   
Puck just holds Finn tighter and opens his mouth to speak, before any sound gets out a yawn cuts him off. Finn chuckles and says, “When was the last time you really slept?” Puck shrugs in response and says “I don’t know, it’s been a while.”  
Finn pulls him in close and says, “Tell you what, you can take a nap and I’ll still be here when you wake up.” Puck nods sleepily into his chest and falls asleep soon after. Finn just chuckles and kisses his small amount of hair before dozing off as well.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! This is my first story on this site, and a comment or kudos would be lovely!


End file.
